“You’re just like your hair, flimsy and floppy. You’re such a pushover,” the cruel words came out of the mouth of one of the most popular girls in school. Most popular girl almost always coincided with mean girl. I felt the sting of her words, but didn’t say anything back. I was used to being put down by kids at school, and at this point in life I was attending the original Mean Girl High. All through my school years I didn’t feel like I really knew myself and I often looked at others and wanted to be them. I was not very self-aware, or perhaps I was too self-aware. I was sort of like a shell of a person, personality not yet formed. As I reached college, this changed dramatically as I discovered my true self and gained confidence. This becoming coincided with my physical blossoming as a late bloomer.

I recently had the opportunity to interview Astrologer and Certified Life Coach, Adriana “Adri” Barnhardt. Her description of how she felt growing up and into adulthood resonated with me as someone who had been consumed for most of my childhood and teenage years with how I was being perceived and talked about. Adri explained that her biggest fear has always been being seen, perceived, and then talked about. It’s interesting because she pursued such a visible career in musical theater before becoming an astrologer and life coach. She loved theater because she could hide behind a role—makeup, costume, lines. If people judged the performance, it wasn’t her, it was the character.

She later realized that what she was really fighting deep down was self-hatred. Years of therapy helped her realize that she doesn’t care as much anymore about what others think of her, because she knows what she thinks of herself. Adri used to feel so lost—no idea who she was or what she wanted, besides wanting to hide. But now she understands her true calling and that clarity has surpassed the fear. She no longer hides behind a character and she feels free to be her most genuine, authentic self. And if someone has a problem with that? That’s a them issue.

Her biggest challenge in life has been becoming her own best friend and unconditionally loving herself. Once she got out of her own way and started her business, lovinglyadri, unlocking what she calls the ILYSM “intuitively love yourself” mentality, everything in her life shifted. She discovered her passions, her real goals, and began working toward the happiest version of her life. Most importantly, she killed her “sh*t-talking inner voice”. Lovinglyadri is a coaching and astrology practice that helps people return to themselves with clarity, compassion, and radical honesty.

Adri is unique in the life coaching world because she combines being a life coach with astrology. She says that her clients have the answers, she just helps them hear the answers louder. Lovinglyadri exists to guide people through the process of self-awareness, unconditional self-love, and intentional living by integrating astrology, coaching, and intuitive wisdom. Adri has now officially launched ILYSM: the lovingly Adri signature method. ILYSM is a mindset shift – from tolerating yourself to intuitively loving yourself. There are four steps and personalized post-session materials, including a customized astrology study guide and anti-spiraling packets. She begins with the client’s birth chart, what she calls your personal happiness manual, and bridges the gap between your cosmic blueprint and your real, lived experience. This is not your typical “mindset reset”; this is deep, intentional integration. After a chart reading, characteristics that a client thought they didn’t like about themselves turn into a characteristic that can be used as their superpower.

Adri explains that this means less spiraling, more grounding. Less obsessing, more action. Less “I should know better by now,” and more “I get it now – and I’ve got me”. If you’ve ever wished your inner voice sounded like someone who actually loves you, Adri’s service is for you.

Adri is always accepting new clients and she wants people to understand astrology as a tool for self-awareness, not some fortune-telling gimmick. She also offers astrology-only readings for people who don’t want the full coaching experience. In addition, she does friend hangs and astrology dinner parties. Her dream is to travel around the world helping humans gain self-awareness, leading to unconditional self-love.

If you would like to learn more about Adri and ILYSM, please visit lovinglyadri.com.

This article was originally published on OpsLens.com.