Join us for a 2020 celebration and the release of my first album! That’s right – Mommy’s Gone Mad! has dropped!
Listen to it on Spotify, Deezer, Tidal, Google Play Music, Amazon Music, YouTube Music, Napster and more! It’s everywhere! I don’t know whether to be horrified or excitedā¦. With tracks like I See Your Boogie and Pee On The Potty, itās sure to be relatable to anyone who spends time with small children. If it entertains just one child, or makes one frazzled parent laugh, I have done my job.
Many thanks to the record company Amuse, Will.i.am and all involved, for the chance to get my release – my own particular brand of lunacy, out to the public – worldwide!
Join us for a listening party – December 31st 8pm to 1am!
As we get closer to the 5th year since my first book, Single in the CIA was published, I thought I would take a few minutes to say a BIG Thank You to all of you for your support and to celebrate some of the accomplishments from these past 5 years. I couldn’t have done it without all of you.
Since becoming a published author, I have been invited to contribute to three different news outlets:
I write a series called Underground California for OpsLens. At the time of writing this I have 12 pieces with them. Here is one of my favorites: California Darkness.
Brainhackers.com focuses on brain health. Here is my favorite piece for them: The Secret to Happiness.
And then there is American Greatness. I was honored, and quite intimidated, to be accepted as a contributor for them – as they have some incredible writers. I currently have one piece for them: American Parent.
In less than 5 years I have gone from:
Ā 0 to 2,849 followers on Twitter
Ā 0 to 1,544 connections on Linked In
Ā 0 to 15K monthly viewers on Pinterest
0 to 213 likes on Facebook
0 to 17 subscribers and 1,943 views on YouTube
Since the publication of my first book, I have had 2 TV appearances – Politics & Profits with Rick Amato and The Drew Berquist Show. I have also had 2 interviews with Hollywood casting directors, as well as discussions with the people at As Seen on TV.
I have invented my very own physical product and had it manufactured. It is now available on Amazon.
You give of yourself in your writing. You touch hearts. Itās a rare gift Shelly. ā David Kamioner, Writer, Contributor and Author of Prisoner of the Chattering Class
No holds barred, precisely the commentary Iāve heard from others in similar situations. Thank you for who you are and being a role model for others to include our 14 year old daughter. Much appreciated. ā Anonymous Reader
I will say it took courage to do what you did. Sort of like charging a machine gun nest. After the first step itās too late to back out. ā Frank Boccia, Author of The Crouching Beast
Thank you so much for being brave enough to show the world this view. You have done society a service with your pen! ā Anonymous Reader
And, last but not least, Single in the CIA is being adapted for TV! That’s right – you may be seeing the book that began it all on your television screens!
As you can see, I have LOTS going on, and more to come. Who knows what the next 5 years has in store, but I’m pretty sure it’s going to be big. I have fun coming up with new ideas and bringing my creations to life!
Again, I thank you all for the support. I hope everyone has a very happy holiday season. Here’s to FUN and laughter!
….He was torn between what he knew to be the right thing to do, and the desire to [redacted length=”extra”] avoid being called back to Headquarters, an action that would effectively end his career.
While most of the men I encountered in the Agency were a particularly narcissistic and womanizing bunch, the women of the Agency definitely took the cake when it came to viciousness and backstabbing. It was as if destroying your fellow female colleagues was a requirement for success as a woman in the Agency. This was rarely accomplished in public view; it was most often a behind-the-scenes demolition of another woman’s reputation.
And so it happens, in every workplace – endless time-wasting meetings, gossip and trash-talking. But at the CIA we were supposed to be above all of that – we were the “cream of the crop”….
….they were discussing the staffing of our office, going over each employee and what their position was. Barry said that when my name was mentioned and Barry described me as “the blonde”, one of the women in the meeting then spent quite a bit of time arguing that I was not a blonde, I was a brunette. The woman making these claims was someone I had met once or twice in passing. According to Barry she was adamant that I was not a blonde, I dyed my hair, and she spent at least ten minutes arguing with him about it. Barry thought the story was funny; I was just appalled. Besides the fact that I have always had blond hair, why was this an acceptable topic of discussion in a front office meeting? I could not understand how the color of my hair was relevant to any staffing meeting in the CIA.
You could say that my twenties and early thirties were an endless procession of douche bags, and most of the men I encountered during my Agency career were no exception. That was acceptable to me, I never considered myself a victim, I was merely along for the ride….. However, I was not prepared nor particularly suited for the reality of the workplace dynamics, in which I spent much of my days dodging perverts and battling unseen enemies lurking behind cubicle walls….
I will never forget seeing the burning on the horizon as I drove down the road. The Pentagon had just been hit. The plane had flown right over the road as I was driving. I had just returned to the Washington DC area, where I lived, from visiting New York City and seeing the Twin Towers in person. I was currently working on a HIDTA money laundering task force with local police, DEA, and IRS agents. I was severely underemployed in the position, but I had dreams of working for the CIA one day and, as is my nature, would not stop trying.
The people in the DC area were mostly a miserable, angry bunch. But after the attacks, I noticed an extreme change. People were suddenly being much kinder to each other. People were letting other people in front of them in the gridlock traffic that makes up the Washington DC area. People were courteous, helpful and respectful.
These days, we have gotten so far away from that. We are back to being angry and hostile. Jumping to conclusions about people we don’t even know. Not listening to one another. Making personal attacks simply because we think we know where a person stands on an issue, mostly based on a social media post. We have family interactions through social media, which is sometimes fake and phony and easily misinterpreted.
I will never forget September 11th and neither will my children.
I recently posted a series of flashback excerpts from my first book, Single in the CIA. Iād like to think my writing has improved dramatically since writing that book. I now have seven published books under my belt (four are part of a short story series). As Iāve written each one, I feel my writing has become more creative. My writing now has evolved from the robotic style of CIA cable writing (also, for much of the time I was writing Single in the CIA I had a newborn sleeping on my lap). As much as I sometimes want to cringe when I read segments of Single in the CIA, I wouldnāt change the voice or what I said. I wanted it to be a sort of purging of memories, without much – if any – commentary about the events I described. I think I succeeded in my wish.
Four years later I have been fortunate enough to have the opportunity to write for OpsLens Media Group. Itās a very different type of writing, but it has definitely helped me to improve further.
As this is my first experience as a news contributor, writing for OpsLens has been quite an eye-opener. I write a series called Underground California in which I highlight issues in the state and try to give a voice to those who do not have one. I try to paint a picture with my writing – to use my creativity to share experiences Iāve had and images Iāve seen.
The staff of contributors at OpsLens is comprised of former intelligence, law enforcement and military. They each offer print and video commentary through the lens of someone who has been there, done that. I truly have friends from all walks of life and I can say that most people who come from those lines of work tend to have fairly conservative views; āConservativeā meaning free-thinking, experience-based opinions. These people donāt get their news from memes on Facebook!
Iāve noticed something lately, and it seems to be getting worse. People seem to be offended and outraged by everything! Iāve seen it in just about every aspect of my life. These days I have been deleted, unfriended, blocked, unfollowed, called nasty names, trolled, misunderstood and just plain treated badly. And itās not just on social media (I use the pop-in-pop-out strategy on social media as it is a necessary evil for me as a small businessperson). I have had family members, blood and otherwise, treat me with disrespect and misplaced anger. I have had old friends distance themselves from me and even call me a farm animal (huh?). It used to be we could discuss differing views and opinions and accept each other as independently thinking individuals. Now, most people canāt even bother to be civil.
A few weeks ago I made a positive, supportive comment on a fellow contributorās article. Weeks later (did I mention I pop in and pop out?) I noticed he had responded, and not in a pleasant manner. It appeared that he was so mad at the world that he twisted my complimentary words into something to be mocked. He recently apologized for jumping to conclusions, but the lesson is still there.
And the list goes on. On another social media channel I was called a ābleached blonde hagā, āRussian botā and told I was a ālonely and desperateā old lady by various trolls. The name-calling is rampant. On yet another channel I was contacted out of the blue after one of my articles was posted that happened to mention our president. The person decided that because I had mentioned my countryās president in a non-negative way (this reader is from another country) that he could not be connected with me on social media any more. Mind you, I donāt personally know these people, I just want them to buy my books and products. Just like everyone else, I am trying to make a living.
Oh – before I receive emails from well-meaning family members trying to give advice on how to handle these things – please, just realize I have an online persona and I do not take these things seriously. Most of my writing is done in a joking tone, playing to the fact that most people put me in the ādumb blondeā category.
Really who cares what I think? Who cares what anyone thinks? Does it really matter? Itās not all about you. Most people are only thinking about themselves and the worries they have from day to day.
Now, this is not to say that I am immune to getting sucked in to the social media rubbish – I am human. I remember back in 1995 when my best friend and I used to fire up that dial-up service, listening anxiously while a noise akin to a robot being strangled filled our ears. We would get into those chat rooms titled āhot-tubā and stir up some shit! But it was more along the lines of āI have big melonsā and people knew how to laugh back then. It was fun, it was harmless.
I suppose you could say I was a troll. But a happy-go-lucky trollā¦ With big melons.
I usually write books and stories about and inspired by my time working for the CIA. But….. I have now written a children’s picture book!
Mommy Thinks She’s a Monster is a touching children’s picture book about Moms and motherhood written from the perspective of a young child, who only wants their mommy to be present in their life. It is the story of the mother of young children who perhaps does not feel quite as attractive as she once did, or even suffers from PPD. This book is written for those moms who are never in the photograph, the moms who cannot find any clothes that fit, the moms who just don’t feel quite right just yet.
This was by far my most collaborative project yet, and probably the most fun! I had the help of some very talented people and they really brought my creation to life!
You can buy an ebook copy or a print version here. You can also purchase a print copy at most other major booksellers. If you don’t see it yet, keep checking and you can always ask your favorite bookseller to order a copy.
As always, thank you for supporting my creative projects!
